becoming a mom is the most magical, terrifying + wonderful experience. you have no idea what you’re doing, but know you would do anything for your tiny human. I am very new to this “mom” thing. and still have days where it feels more like a dream than my reality.
being a mom.
there are so many decisions you have to make as a parent (even before your baby arrives). how will you plan their entrance into the world? (as if babies are predictable + will go along with said plan). how will you feed your child and how often? where will they sleep and when? will you go back to work or stay home? the list is quite literally never-ending! it’s stressful. I did research until my brain pled with me to stop. I felt like I had to. while I was pregnant, I was asked all of these questions. instead of just answering, I felt the need to defend my decision.
I appreciated the advice + personal stories, but was not amused by the unsolicited opinions.
like I said, I did my research and I know how my family operates. I didn’t make these decisions lightly. I took them very, very seriously. it’s my child + his well-being after all. my growing family was my ONLY priority! so when someone asked me, where my baby was going to sleep? I’d respond with “in his crib” and the lengthy decision as to why before they had a chance to greet my answer with a single word. I was defensive.
the toughest pill for me to swallow becoming + being a mom has been the judgement. or what feels like judgement.
let me be real with you: I didn’t hesitate to say “YES!” to the epidural when offered. my baby has slept in his crib, in his room since the night we brought him home. he naps better on his stomach, so I let him. he is formula fed, partly by choice + partly because watching your baby struggling to learn how to eat is heart-wrenching. (especially after 5 days of life with no food. only nutrients fed through a tube in his belly button). we couldn’t imagine introducing a whole new way of eating after he FINALLY got it. so, we didn’t it. (you can read why jackson was in the NICU in his birth story). I went back to work after 12 weeks. he goes to a daycare center + the germs are real. him + I were both under the weather by day 5. he is on a feeding schedule we don’t sway from*. and he has slept through the night since just before 2 months old*. (*unless he’s sick, because then all bets are off).
was all of that in “the plan?” some, yes. but you make decisions as you go + listen to your baby. they’ll tell you “this works” or “try again”.
I said all of that, to say this ..
being a mom is incredibly rewarding, but also very hard. we should support each other. raise each other up. give our opinions when asked, but save them when we’re not. what works best for my family, may not work at all for yours. in no way do I believe my way is the best way. it’s just my way. or maybe less “my way”, and more just what works for my baby. they’re all different + so are we. there is no mold. thank goodness! so, let’s all be kind to one another.
we’re all just doing our best.